Do you Tear Walls Down or Construct Them?

One of the areas I oversee at Evergreen is our First Impressions Team. It is a common understanding in the church world that a guest will make a decision to return for a second visit in the first seven minutes. It’s called the Seven Minute Rule.

Think about that for a moment. Seven minutes, that is before they have heard our amazing worship, that is before they have heard Jim’s spell binding message, that is before they have had a chance to experience a powerful response time. They make the decision to return or not based on how they experienced us upon arrival. Did they feel welcomed, safe, noticed, and valued?

When we don’t experience these things we tend to build walls. We put up our guard out of defense. When I feel uncertain about my surroundings, when I don’t feel safe or welcomed, I will add bricks to my wall and put up my guard. When our guard is up, we become much less open to connection with others, to a move of God in our heart, and much less sensitive to the Holy Spirit. Our goal, as the First Impressions Team, is to tear down walls of defense not construct them.

It has been said that a churches culture is how someone experiences you. The first seven minutes are crucial for guests to have a positive experience with our culture. I want to throw out an idea. The idea that making people feel welcomed is not just the responsibility of our staff or official volunteers, it’s everyone’s responsibility who calls ECC home. I want to propose the idea that you are already part of the First Impressions Team whether you know it or not and are helping shape the ECC culture.

There are three basic needs that all of us have to feel welcomed and valued. We all need to be seen, heard, and have a sense of belonging. You are already participating in how people experience this at ECC every Sunday.

Have you ever had the frustrating experience of being someplace new and not knowing where to go or what to do next? Then to make the experience worse, you seem to have developed the superpower of being invisible because nobody seems to notice you?

Everyone deserves to be seen. It is a common courtesy to notice other people and to acknowledge their presence. When you noticing them, you smile, you greet, you nod your head your shake their hand, all this communicates that they matter. That you are glad they are there. Being seen is a basic need of us all.

I think we have all experienced the loneliness, rejection, and disrespect of not being heard or listened to. Not being heard is a devaluing experience. When we don’t take time to listen, intently listen, we shout “You don’t really matter to me!”.  We often do this unintentionally. I am so guilty of this and it is something that I’m determined to change about myself. I don’t need to list examples of how we do this, I think we all know when and how this happens. We owe people around us the respect and dignity of being heard.

One of the strongest human feelings we experience is a sense of belonging. Some families have it, some teams have it, some military units have it, some churches and movements are defined by it. A sense of belonging is powerful. To feel “I belong here” means you know people are glad you are there. You know they notice when you are not and miss you. You know you contribute and your contribution is valued. These are powerful and life changing feelings.  

This is our opportunity to make a huge difference. We all are part of the ECC First Impressions Team. When a person sits next to you, your interaction or lack thereof is directly tied to how they experienced ECC. You are ECC and you are setting our culture whether you know it or not.

So I’m asking you to consider taking your official or unofficial role on the First Impressions Team as serious as I do. Understanding that every interaction you have or don’t have with those you come into contact with on Sunday is shaping our culture. You play a part in the Seven Minute Rule. My dream is that ECC would be known as the friendliest, most inviting, and welcoming church in the PNW and there is no way we can accomplish this without everyone’s participation. We all must wholly embody this identity.

As believers in Jesus, we are called to embody His love. Let John 13:35 become true of ECC.

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:35

Will you join me?